I Iagree with the statement that it is much harder to listen than to talk. After all, what it means to say? We can learn some text and just retell it to the public. Or we can speak our mind, and of course we think it's interesting, because it is our thoughts! But not all people agree with our opinion, and as they begin to express their opinions, ask questions, because they do not understand something, we are beginning to be irritable. It is very difficult to be criticized. Because your opinion is always right for you. So, to say it's easy, but much harder to hear.... Good listening is an essential part of being a good leader. You cannot be a good leader unless you are a good listener. You as a leader must be very aware of the feedback you are receiving from the people around you. If you are not a good listener, your future as a leader will be short. I might add that being a good listener is a skill important in many other settings. For example, being a good listener will enhance your social relationships of all types, marriage, dating, parties, work, etc.
Have you ever stopped to think that we require courses and training in our education in speaking and writing, but not in listening? Why not? Are such skills important? Yes! Can you or I improve our listening capacity through purposive efforts? Again, the answer is clear: yes! Do we know what it takes to be a good listener? Another, yes. Why do we leave the learning of good listening skills to hard-earned experience or chance? Probably, the only answer is tradition. The people who established "reading, writing and arithmetic" as the content of American schools did not recognize the need for other skills such as listening. Poor listening habits are very common. Indeed, poor listening skills are more common than poor speaking skills. I am sure that you have seen on many occasions, two or more people talking to each other at the same time. People cannot talk and be an effective listener at the same instance. So I think that no matter how much you have ears but to listen will always be the most difficult occupation to which you need to learn more than one day, or even one month.
I truly believe that ability to listen is very important. But lets don't forget about speaking. In the sphere of our future profession is so important to know how to speak. How to convince partners, how to convey what you mean, how to prove you opinion without any conflict, how to give the advice without any misunderstanding. Maybe we have only one mouth because our speech is more powerful? And God just wanted to keep a balance? And all we need is to teach how use our speech. And a loot of people just dont know how to do that.Its not so easy. I mean be able to speak effectively. To know what and when you should say. if we assume that God give us two ears because its harder to listen. why in this case we have any problems with communication? if it's so easy to speak! my opinion is that some people don't know how to speak in the right way. because it's harder to speak. and its harder to learn right speaking. During our education we all learn NOT how to listen but how to speak! I'm not reject the importance of good listening skills. I'm shure that you can not listen without speaking at the same time you cannot speak without listening. it's some kind of system. ask what is more important it's the same if someone ask what was the first egg or chicken. But every one have opinions so do I.
I agree with this quote, because for progress of our society, for peaceful relationships people should listen to each other. I think the biggest part of conflicts appears because of misunderstanding. In its turns, misunderstanding caused by poor listening. If people can be more patient they could heard each other. Moreover if people could be more emphatic I think quality of listening can increase in cases. Also if people could less egoistic and concerned about themselves they can hear much more information and open new horizons. Often people who don’t hear the rest or taken out of context start judge too quickly. Such situations also cause troubles for every side of negotiations, because interrupter even doesn’t give a chance to speaker to present the idea to the end. On the other hand we are given two ears, but only one mouth because to say something interesting, important and useful for the first we should listen information, we should take it from external sources. Only after that, after rethinking we can give new opinion based on previous experience and it would be modified and suit to current conditions. And by such way we can receive positive results of development. Humanity can improve only with joint efforts. If we won’t do this it can lead to sad consequences. Even if we view on this quote on casual level, we can see that people who listening is more pleasing for society. And conversely person, who talking every time is irritative, annoying and society try to avoid conversation with such interlocutor. Such person should understand how important is being heard, so listener should respect speaker and also speaker should do this. Speaker can make easier task of listener. If speaker present his idea distinctly, clear and laconically listener will be interested with his speech. And listener can ask clarify questions which also can help to speaker. And by this way all participants of negotiations will receive good and effective result. So in the end I want to say that both of processes are hard, but as we can see listening is much harder than talking. But if sides of conversation help each other every person will gain from it. Everything is in our hands.
"We are given two ears, but only one mouth. This is because God knew that listening was twice as hard as talking."
I totally agree with this with this statement. It is very impirtant, especially for us like future businessmen, economists or managers. Distractions are easy to come by when it comes time to listen. The human mind can absorb about 300 words a minute. Most people, however, talk at about 100 to 175 words a minute. In our fast-paced world, it is easy to want to fill the excess capacity by doing something else. Don’t. The trick is to employ skills that allow you to listen actively. Active listening is listening with a purpose. The purpose will change from interaction to interaction, but always keep in mind that you are listening for something. First and foremost, stop talking! It is difficult to listen and speak at the same time. • Put the other person at ease. Give them space and time and “permission” to speak. How we look at them, how we stand or sit, makes a huge difference: Relax, and let them relax as well. • Show the other person that you want to hear them. Look at them. Nod when you can agree, ask them to explain further if you don’t understand. Listen to understand them and their words, rather than just for your turn.Remove distractions. Good listening means being willing to turn off the TV, close a door, stop returning emails or reading your mail. Give the speaker your full attention, and let them know they are getting your full attention. • Empathize with the other person. Especially if they are telling you something personal or painful, or something you intensely disagree with, take a moment to stand in their shoes, to look at the situation from their point of view. • Be patient. Some people take longer to find the right word, to make a point or clarify an issue. Give the speaker time to get it all out before you jump in with your reply. • Watch your own emotions. If what they are saying creates an emotional response in you, be extra careful to listen carefully, with attention to the intent and full meaning of their words. When we are angry, frightened or upset, we often miss critical parts of what is being said to us. • Be very slow to disagree, criticize or argue. Even if you disagree, let them have their point of view. If you respond in a way that makes the other person defensive, even if you “win” the argument, you may lose something far more valuable. • Ask lots of questions. Ask the speaker to clarify, to say more, give an example, or explain further. It will help them speak more precisely and it will help you hear and understand them more accurately. • STOP TALKING! This is both the first and the last point, because all other tools depend on it. Nature gave us two ears and only one tongue, which is a gentle hint that we should listen twice as much as we talk. Also, remember, good communications skills are perishable and require practice to keep them sharp.
I completely agree with my colleagues , but all of us hear, but only few people can listening. Yes we have two ears , but also we have two eyes and two arms , two legs . It’s not to say that walking or seeing difficult.Become a good listener is like to be a champion in the sport , you need heavy daily workouts . Just sit down and listen to the people is not easy , and even more so if it's not just a man , and your business partner . We must learn to put the "anchor" so as not to lose the essence of the conversation . Necessary internal motivation and understanding of what being a good listener will help in life. Every man wants to be understood and active listening will help other people to understand it. Listen carefully and perceive information differently. Need to be patient and start training their listenership quality . Always be polite and do not interrupt the main thing that's usually a good listener . In today's world, the ability to listen is highly appreciated. Increasingly, you can see signs with announcing about listening courses . In general, I wish everyone to reach the top of art is not only listening, but also understanding.
It's very wise statement. To my mind it's impossible to disagree with this explanation of quantity of the ears. I believe that everyone should think before using something. This is also regards the using of the organs of our body. For example, we should think for what we need our stomach before overloading it by food. So, we should think, that we need ears to listening and hear. The mouth we need to express minds about what we've heard. To express minds we need analyse information, that we've received. To do this in the rightest way, we have to understand, what we hear. And the one way to understand clearly is to listen attentively. Whatever we say, it is important to value every word, especially when our answer is waited by the partner. So, one mouth means that we should say well circumspect things. The fact of the matter is not only in respect to the partner, but in self respect. It's more important to listen to the end to do right conclusions, than to look like courteous. In same time, to show your respect and understanding to your partner is also important. His turn to listen and your turn to speak will come. From your ability to listen will depend, if the partner will allow you understand him or not and will want to understand you or not. So, to say something well, we should well think. To well think, we should well hear. To well hear, we should listen. To listen, we should well keep silence and shouldn't speak.
If I were asked to name the greatest mankind's gifts, the possibility to speak would be on the second place. Why? In my opinion, the possibility to listen is the most valuable in any interaction from the business conversation to the simple socialising with your friends, am I right? Unfortunatelly, people often make mistakes in listenning, that create certain difficulties in communiation. Fortunatelly, there are some tips to avoid them:
Remove All Distractions
In this day and age, in our quest to get as much done as we can, we multi-task the whole time. So when people approach us to talk, it's natural we add that to the list of things we're doing at the moment, vs. giving them our full attention. If the person is trying to tell you something important, or share something personal, you should ideally stop what you are doing and give him/her your full attention.
Be Present
To be a good listener, you have to be present. Being present means (a) not being preoccupied physically (b) not being preoccupied mentally. The former means to remove distractions, as I mentioned in Tip #1. The latter requires you to clear your mind of other thoughts and focus on the person speaking.
Wait for the Person to Finish Speaking (in the start) It's good etiquette to let the other party finish what he/she wants to say, before you butt in with your comments. I know there are times you feel you get what the person is trying to say and you can't wait to share your comments, but hold it off in the beginning of the conversation. Because the person may have other things to share but can't because you are speaking.
Don't Assume Anything
An important part of listening is not to assume. When you assume, you automatically layer over what the person says with your presumptions, which makes it near impossible to have any meaningful conversation. While the person may say A, ultimately you can only hear B, simply because your mind is not open to receiving new information in the first place.
Look at the Sub-Text
Powerful listening requires you to understand that the words articulated in a conversation do not always represent the person's intentions. Many times, we are not 100% clear about what we're trying to say, and talking is really our way of processing our thoughts.
Clarify to ensure you got what the person is saying
At every stage of the conversation, clarify to ensure you got the message right. This can be done by simply paraphrasing what he/she just said, in your own words. Sometimes we may take away one message when it's really something else, and it's not good to assume without clarifying first (see #4).
Ask Questions
Questions are highly important in any conversation. Firstly, there are things which the person does not share (either because he/she thinks you already know them or because he/she thinks they are irrelevant) that you can only uncover by asking questions. Secondly, questions lets you get more information about specific areas you are unclear about, such that you get a better picture of what the person is saying. In my opinion, such tips are easy to learn and to implement. So treasure you gift and master your listener skills!
I Iagree with the statement that it is much harder to listen than to talk. After all, what it means to say? We can learn some text and just retell it to the public. Or we can speak our mind, and of course we think it's interesting, because it is our thoughts! But not all people agree with our opinion, and as they begin to express their opinions, ask questions, because they do not understand something, we are beginning to be irritable. It is very difficult to be criticized. Because your opinion is always right for you. So, to say it's easy, but much harder to hear....
ReplyDeleteGood listening is an essential part of being a good leader. You cannot be a good leader unless you are a good listener. You as a leader must be very aware of the feedback you are receiving from the people around you. If you are not a good listener, your future as a leader will be short. I might add that being a good listener is a skill important in many other settings. For example, being a good listener will enhance your social relationships of all types, marriage, dating, parties, work, etc.
Have you ever stopped to think that we require courses and training in our education in speaking and writing, but not in listening? Why not? Are such skills important? Yes! Can you or I improve our listening capacity through purposive efforts? Again, the answer is clear: yes! Do we know what it takes to be a good listener? Another, yes. Why do we leave the learning of good listening skills to hard-earned experience or chance? Probably, the only answer is tradition. The people who established "reading, writing and arithmetic" as the content of American schools did not recognize the need for other skills such as listening. Poor listening habits are very common. Indeed, poor listening skills are more common than poor speaking skills. I am sure that you have seen on many occasions, two or more people talking to each other at the same time. People cannot talk and be an effective listener at the same instance.
So I think that no matter how much you have ears but to listen will always be the most difficult occupation to which you need to learn more than one day, or even one month.
I truly believe that ability to listen is very important.
ReplyDeleteBut lets don't forget about speaking.
In the sphere of our future profession is so important to know how to speak.
How to convince partners, how to convey what you mean, how to prove you opinion without any conflict, how to give the advice without any misunderstanding.
Maybe we have only one mouth because our speech is more powerful? And God just wanted to keep a balance?
And all we need is to teach how use our speech. And a loot of people just dont know how to do that.Its not so easy. I mean be able to speak effectively. To know what and when you should say. if we assume that God give us two ears because its harder to listen. why in this case we have any problems with communication? if it's so easy to speak! my opinion is that some people don't know how to speak in the right way. because it's harder to speak. and its harder to learn right speaking.
During our education we all learn NOT how to listen but how to speak!
I'm not reject the importance of good listening skills. I'm shure that you can not listen without speaking at the same time you cannot speak without listening. it's some kind of system.
ask what is more important it's the same if someone ask what was the first egg or chicken.
But every one have opinions so do I.
I agree with this quote, because for progress of our society, for peaceful relationships people should listen to each other. I think the biggest part of conflicts appears because of misunderstanding. In its turns, misunderstanding caused by poor listening. If people can be more patient they could heard each other. Moreover if people could be more emphatic I think quality of listening can increase in cases. Also if people could less egoistic and concerned about themselves they can hear much more information and open new horizons. Often people who don’t hear the rest or taken out of context start judge too quickly. Such situations also cause troubles for every side of negotiations, because interrupter even doesn’t give a chance to speaker to present the idea to the end.
ReplyDeleteOn the other hand we are given two ears, but only one mouth because to say something interesting, important and useful for the first we should listen information, we should take it from external sources. Only after that, after rethinking we can give new opinion based on previous experience and it would be modified and suit to current conditions. And by such way we can receive positive results of development. Humanity can improve only with joint efforts. If we won’t do this it can lead to sad consequences.
Even if we view on this quote on casual level, we can see that people who listening is more pleasing for society. And conversely person, who talking every time is irritative, annoying and society try to avoid conversation with such interlocutor.
Such person should understand how important is being heard, so listener should respect speaker and also speaker should do this. Speaker can make easier task of listener. If speaker present his idea distinctly, clear and laconically listener will be interested with his speech. And listener can ask clarify questions which also can help to speaker. And by this way all participants of negotiations will receive good and effective result. So in the end I want to say that both of processes are hard, but as we can see listening is much harder than talking. But if sides of conversation help each other every person will gain from it. Everything is in our hands.
"We are given two ears, but only one mouth.
ReplyDeleteThis is because God knew that listening
was twice as hard as talking."
I totally agree with this with this statement. It is very impirtant, especially for us like future businessmen, economists or managers.
Distractions are easy to come by when it comes time to listen. The human mind can absorb about 300 words a minute. Most people, however, talk at about 100 to 175 words a minute. In our fast-paced world, it is easy to want to fill the excess capacity by doing something else. Don’t. The trick is to employ skills that allow you to listen actively.
Active listening is listening with a purpose. The purpose will change from interaction to interaction, but always keep in mind that you are listening for something.
First and foremost, stop talking! It is difficult to listen and speak at the same time.
• Put the other person at ease. Give them space and time and “permission” to speak. How we look at them, how we stand or sit, makes a huge difference: Relax, and let them relax as well.
• Show the other person that you want to hear them. Look at them. Nod when you can agree, ask them to explain further if you don’t understand. Listen to understand them and their words, rather than just for your turn.Remove distractions. Good listening means being willing to turn off the TV, close a door, stop returning emails or reading your mail. Give the speaker your full attention, and let them know they are getting your full attention.
• Empathize with the other person. Especially if they are telling you something personal
or painful, or something you intensely disagree with, take a moment to stand in their shoes, to look at the situation from their point of view.
• Be patient. Some people take longer to find the right word, to make a point or clarify an issue. Give the speaker time to get it all out before you jump in with your reply.
• Watch your own emotions. If what they are saying creates an emotional response in you, be extra careful to listen carefully, with attention to the intent and full meaning of their words. When we are angry, frightened or upset, we often miss critical parts of
what is being said to us.
• Be very slow to disagree, criticize or argue. Even if you disagree, let them have their
point of view. If you respond in a way that makes the other person defensive, even if you “win” the argument, you may lose something far more valuable.
• Ask lots of questions. Ask the speaker to clarify, to say more, give an example, or explain further. It will help them speak more precisely and it will help you hear and understand them more accurately.
• STOP TALKING! This is both the first and the last point, because all other tools depend on it. Nature gave us two ears and only one tongue, which is a gentle hint that we should listen twice as much as we talk.
Also, remember, good communications skills are perishable and require practice to keep them sharp.
I completely agree with my colleagues , but all of us hear, but only few people can listening. Yes we have two ears , but also we have two eyes and two arms , two legs . It’s not to say that walking or seeing difficult.Become a good listener is like to be a champion in the sport , you need heavy daily workouts .
ReplyDeleteJust sit down and listen to the people is not easy , and even more so if it's not just a man , and your business partner . We must learn to put the "anchor" so as not to lose the essence of the conversation . Necessary internal motivation and understanding of what being a good listener will help in life. Every man wants to be understood and active listening will help other people to understand it. Listen carefully and perceive information differently. Need to be patient and start training their listenership quality .
Always be polite and do not interrupt the main thing that's usually a good listener . In today's world, the ability to listen is highly appreciated. Increasingly, you can see signs with announcing about listening courses .
In general, I wish everyone to reach the top of art is not only listening, but also understanding.
It's very wise statement. To my mind it's impossible to disagree with this explanation of quantity of the ears. I believe that everyone should think before using something. This is also regards the using of the organs of our body. For example, we should think for what we need our stomach before overloading it by food. So, we should think, that we need ears to listening and hear. The mouth we need to express minds about what we've heard. To express minds we need analyse information, that we've received. To do this in the rightest way, we have to understand, what we hear. And the one way to understand clearly is to listen attentively. Whatever we say, it is important to value every word, especially when our answer is waited by the partner.
ReplyDeleteSo, one mouth means that we should say well circumspect things. The fact of the matter is not only in respect to the partner, but in self respect. It's more important to listen to the end to do right conclusions, than to look like courteous. In same time, to show your respect and understanding to your partner is also important. His turn to listen and your turn to speak will come. From your ability to listen will depend, if the partner will allow you understand him or not and will want to understand you or not.
So, to say something well, we should well think. To well think, we should well hear. To well hear, we should listen. To listen, we should well keep silence and shouldn't speak.
If I were asked to name the greatest mankind's gifts, the possibility to speak would be on the second place. Why? In my opinion, the possibility to listen is the most valuable in any interaction from the business conversation to the simple socialising with your friends, am I right?
ReplyDeleteUnfortunatelly, people often make mistakes in listenning, that create certain difficulties in communiation. Fortunatelly, there are some tips to avoid them:
Remove All Distractions
In this day and age, in our quest to get as much done as we can, we multi-task the whole time. So when people approach us to talk, it's natural we add that to the list of things we're doing at the moment, vs. giving them our full attention. If the person is trying to tell you something important, or share something personal, you should ideally stop what you are doing and give him/her your full attention.
Be Present
To be a good listener, you have to be present. Being present means (a) not being preoccupied physically (b) not being preoccupied mentally. The former means to remove distractions, as I mentioned in Tip #1. The latter requires you to clear your mind of other thoughts and focus on the person speaking.
Wait for the Person to Finish Speaking (in the start)
It's good etiquette to let the other party finish what he/she wants to say, before you butt in with your comments. I know there are times you feel you get what the person is trying to say and you can't wait to share your comments, but hold it off in the beginning of the conversation. Because the person may have other things to share but can't because you are speaking.
Don't Assume Anything
An important part of listening is not to assume. When you assume, you automatically layer over what the person says with your presumptions, which makes it near impossible to have any meaningful conversation. While the person may say A, ultimately you can only hear B, simply because your mind is not open to receiving new information in the first place.
Look at the Sub-Text
Powerful listening requires you to understand that the words articulated in a conversation do not always represent the person's intentions. Many times, we are not 100% clear about what we're trying to say, and talking is really our way of processing our thoughts.
Clarify to ensure you got what the person is saying
At every stage of the conversation, clarify to ensure you got the message right. This can be done by simply paraphrasing what he/she just said, in your own words. Sometimes we may take away one message when it's really something else, and it's not good to assume without clarifying first (see #4).
Ask Questions
Questions are highly important in any conversation. Firstly, there are things which the person does not share (either because he/she thinks you already know them or because he/she thinks they are irrelevant) that you can only uncover by asking questions. Secondly, questions lets you get more information about specific areas you are unclear about, such that you get a better picture of what the person is saying.
In my opinion, such tips are easy to learn and to implement. So treasure you gift and master your listener skills!